Trust

Trust.  It’s one of the hardest things in the world to give.  Wells, for me it is.  I have a hard time understanding how someone is able to trust someone else.  There are so many examples of betrayal, deceit, and deception, yet people are still able to trust…..and that fascinates and eludes me.

                My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 and a half years.  He is the sweetest, gentlest, and most loving person I have ever met and I have never been happier, but for a long time in our relationship I had the hardest time trusting him.  Trusting that he won’t cheat on me or lie to me or believing him when he tells me he loves me.  He had never done anything to cause me to have these feelings.  I just never understood how someone could just put all of their faith and trust into someone knowing that that trusted person then had the ability of letting them down.  Not just letting them down but letting that trusting person to fall and break.  I felt like I couldn’t come back from that.  We have even had innumerable conversations with him telling me how me not trusting him makes him hurts him and me trying to explain how hard it is for me to trust.  Insecurities are very detrimental to relationships and not having faith or trust in the relationship could be the CAUSE of the relationship ending.  I should trust him and have faith in our relationship.  Daniel used to remind me of that every time we had that conversation.  So I worked on it.  Every time I would feel bad thoughts creep into my head I would think about all the happy times Daniel and I have had together and the bad thoughts would then seem really stupid and unrealistic.

 I have been able to overcome my trust issues and it amazes me how much better I feel in our relationship.  I used to have all these horrible scenarios that would constantly be playing in my head of all the bad things that could happen.  Now…..I just love and trust and have faith and I have never felt better J….and I know Daniel feels better knowing that I do.